On Monday, August 2nd, I had a doctor’s appointment where he stripped my membranes to see if we could get things going. He said if it was going to do any good, then it would happen that day, otherwise we were just back to waiting. At that appointment I also asked him what he thought about me traveling to Salt Lake for Kyle and Kelsey’s wedding on the 4th. He told me that as far as safety was concerned it wasn’t a safety issue, because there is a hospital 5 minutes from the Salt Lake Temple. The real issue would be that it would be an inconvenience for me to deliver in an unfamiliar hospital with a doctor I’d never met. He also told me that my uterus was all ready to go and that I could go into labor at anytime. He warned me that at any point my water could break unexpectedly and if that happened I would need to go to a hospital right away, so there was a chance that by going up to Salt Lake I would have to deliver at the hospital there. But he said the choice was up to me, since there weren’t any safety concerns.
Most of the day after my doctor’s appointment I felt really crumby, kind of nauseous and achy and very unmotivated to do anything, but not in my stomach area, so I didn’t think I was starting anything. I just kept telling myself I was just disappointed with the doctor’s appointment, and to try and find something else for my mind to concentrate on besides not going into labor. That night, around 8:30 or so, I started having contractions. Nothing big, just really mild ones that were only slightly worse than a Braxton Hicks. But they were coming pretty regularly every 10 minutes. So Aaron and I just kept timing them to see if anything else would happen. While we waited Aaron got all our things together and in a bag by the door, and then put a list on the door of things to remember to grab on our way out (the camera, my ID, my bag and the baby’s bag). The contractions never got more intense and they never got closer together. We started watching a movie to try and take our minds off the time in between the contractions, and by the time we were half way through the movie the contractions had completely stopped. We had talked to Aaron’s sister Sydni earlier, and she told us that that had happened to her too, she’d had her membranes stripped and then had a couple hours of contractions, but then it was two weeks before her baby came. So we were kind of expecting that since the contractions weren’t very intense and so far apart.
Tuesday morning I woke up feeling great. I’d slept pretty well, and I even felt like I had some energy. A couple of my friends from the apartment complex were walking to a park about three blocks away to let the kids play, and I decided that we would go too. The walk was great, I didn’t get over-heated or too tired. Lincoln and Ivan had a great morning at the park and were well behaved and left really well when I told them it was time to go. The walk home was nice, lunch went well, the kids both had naps. After naps we decided to go out back and turn on the sprinklers for the kids to run through. We invited a few people that live around here. Everyone had a great time. I was still feeling great. When Aaron got home we ran some errands for the apartment complex, then came home and made hamburgers for dinner. We bathed the kids and put them to bed.
At around 9:30pm we started talking about what we were going to do about Kyle’s wedding, whether we should attempt to go or not. I was feeling really nervous about trying to get up there... like every time I thought about it I got sick to my stomach and wanted to throw up. But I was also feeling like I really really didn’t want to miss it and that if I felt good enough I should make the effort. So Aaron and I started looking up on the internet how to get to the hospital in Salt Lake from the temple, and where to park at the temple so that if we needed to leave the temple quickly we could get to our car without having to walk a million blocks.
While Aaron was looking for all that information, I went to use the bathroom. While I was sitting there I felt this popping sensation, like when you accidentally fill a water balloon too full without realizing it and it pops and surprises you. And there was about that much of a gush of water. I called out, “Aaron! I think my water just broke.” He asked me if I was sure, and I said I was pretty sure, but not 100% since I was going to the bathroom when it happened, maybe there was just more in there than I had thought. He asked me if I was having contractions, and I said no, not at all. With all my other pregnancies I had at least an hour’s worth of fairly tough contractions before my water broke, and with those two pregnancies the babies arrived within 10 minutes time of my water breaking. We waited a minute or two to see if we could see any signs that my water actually had broken. And when I stood up, water slowly but steadily still dripped out of me. So at that point I was pretty sure it was my water.
We called the on-call night person at my OB’s office to see if we should head to the hospital or not because I wasn’t having any contractions at all still. The nurse said she would page the on call doctor and have him call us. We waited a minute, but then I remembered that I was pretty sure my doctor had said to go to the hospital immediately if your water broke. And we decided it was better to go in now and be sent home than to not go in and have the baby in our living room.
Luckily all our bags and everything were ready to go, since Aaron had packed them the night before. Our next door neighbors were life savers, and willingly came right over to spend the night on our couch so that someone was here with the boys. We got in the car and got a little ways down the road and Aaron was like, “Oh, I forgot your ID, we need to go back.” And I was like, “No let’s just go, it’s not that big of a deal.” And Aaron, “Well, I forgot the camera too.” Me, “Ok. Go back. But this is why we made that list!” I was willing to go without my ID, but not without my camera. : ) So we went back and Aaron ran in really quick and got those things. Then we drove to the hospital which is about a block away from our house. We parked and walked inside. I still wasn’t having contractions, but I thought it was funny that as soon as the security guard at the desk saw us he said, “Go on up, 5th floor.” (Typically if you come in after hours you are supposed to check-in at the desk) and as we were waiting for the elevator we heard him say to the guy next to him, “We’ve delivered babies in the lobby before, not fun. We can, but I don’t like to.” And in my head I too was really glad he wouldn’t be delivering our baby in the lobby.
We got to the 5th floor, Labor and Delivery, and went to check in with the nurse at the desk. First thing she asked Aaron for was ID, Aaron said, “Mine or hers?” And the nurse said, “We need hers.” Good thing we went back for it, I guess. The nurse asked us if we were hoping to get to stay and have a baby, and we said yes hopefully, and she said as soon as she was done with the paper work she’d get someone to check me and see if they were going to admit me or not. Then she asked how far apart my contractions were. I told her I wasn’t having any at all, but that my water had broke. And she said, “Oh, well then you’ll definitely be staying. We’ll get you a room when we’re done with this.”
She took us to our room and had me change into my gown. Still no contractions. I paced back and forth in the room because I was antsy, and wondering what it meant that I hadn’t had contractions yet. I was a little worried that it meant something wasn’t going right, because like I said before, I’d always had at least an hour of contractions when my water broke and the babies always came very quickly after that. Finally while I was pacing, at about 10:15pm I had my first contraction. It wasn’t very bad, and I had about two more while I paced, until the nurse came in to hook me up to the monitors and check on my progress. Once I was laying in the bed and she checked me and made a really surprised face and asked me again, “You haven’t been having contractions earlier today have you?” “No.” “Just the few you had a bit ago?” “Yes.” “Hmmm, well, you’re dilated to a 7, so I imagine things are going to go pretty quickly from here. I’ll page Dr. Thorpe and let him know you are here, and at a 7 and a +1 station. You are going un-medicated correct?” “Yes.”
For the next hour or so I just layed in the bed and had contractions. Aaron was the best labor coach I could ever ask for. He stayed right by my side the whole time and rubbed my caves, and helped me do calming visualizations about sitting in quiet meadows and on calm beaches. He told me stories of things he remembered from growing up, and talked to me about our coming baby and what life would be like with her. It was very helpful to have him to focus on. When a contraction would hit, he would walk me through relaxation by pointing out things that I should relax. This is a Bradley method technique. He usually started with my lower back, and then either went up to my shoulders and head, or down through my legs and feet. And when he would tell me to relax each thing, I made a conscious effort to do so, and it almost always worked, especially if I wasn’t even aware that I was tensing that part of me.
My contractions were very consistently 5 minutes apart. They were pretty painful, but not unbearable, and didn’t seem to be getting any more intense, just steadily painful and consistently 5 minutes apart. I was actually worried about this, because in my previous labors things started at about this point, but then contractions fairly quickly got more intense, longer, and closer together, and by the time it was pushing time they seemed right on top of one another, almost like a never ending contraction. But this time I was getting 5 minute breathers in between and I thought that for sure that meant that this labor was going to take an eternity.
I need to take a time out from the story for a second and explain something. For the last month or so I have been having a very real fear of going through the labor and delivery process again. Fear is an interesting thing, because where there is fear, there is no faith…or in my case no confidence in myself or what I’m capable of doing. Like I mentioned earlier, I don’t get an epidural, or any medication to have my babies. For me having a quicker recovery (like being able to get up and use the bathroom by myself immediately after delivery), not having a huge needle shoved up my back, and the peace of mind that I don’t have to wonder whether the epidural medicine will affect my baby in any way or not, and the fact that I have very quick labors, are worth a few hours of pain to me. Now, if I were one of those people that have 20+ hour labors, it might be a different story, and I definitely don’t judge anyone on their choice of what’s best for them, but for me, going natural is the better option. But it’s also a pretty daunting option. And this time, for some reason, it scared me to death. You’d think that because I’d already been through it twice before that it wouldn’t be so terrifying…but instead I found myself up late in the middle of the nights, reliving Ivan’s and Lincoln’s births in my head, and being very doubtful that I would be able to pull something like that off again. Thinking about it long enough very seriously turned my spine into jelly, and eventually any time my mind wandered in that direction, I’d just have to tell myself I’d deal with it when the time came, and move on to something else.
So, I went in to this labor without even coming close to having conquered my fear of it. And I felt like I was lacking the confidence I needed. So then when things were going so differently than the others, I was very uncertain. I spent the times in between contractions, praying and begging Heavenly Father to please be with me, and to help me be brave, and to help me endure whatever it was I was going to have to endure in the next while.
The nurse kept telling us to let us know if contractions ever got closer together, or if I ever started to feel any pressure. The contractions very rhythmically made their way to being about 3 minutes apart, and more intense but never any big jumps, it was all just very methodical. I started feeling some pressure, so the nurse came in and checked me and said I was at about a 9 and a half. She called the doctor even though I had a tiny bit still to go, because I was feeling the pressure.
When Dr. Thorpe came in, she told him I still had a tiny bit to go on one side, but that the baby was really low. In my mind I kept thinking, “Oh no…we are getting close to the worse part, the pushing, and there’s pressure, which makes it a lot harder to relax, and I’m not even ready to be there, this is going to take a long time, and pushing is always the part where I have the hardest time being self confident, it’s about that point where I usually fall apart emotionally, and if it takes a long time, I don’t know if I can do it.” Dr. Thorpe checked my cervix, agreed with what the nurse said, but said we’d see what happened after this next contraction. The next contraction was pretty rough, especially with the extra pressure/pushing of someone’s fingers up there…not comfortable. But then Dr. Thorpe said, “Ok, I think we can push.” Push?! What? My contractions, although pretty intense at this point, were still coming 3 minutes apart or so, and I was still able to get on top of them emotionally and relax my way through them. I was so caught off guard that he wanted me to push. But I pushed.
I tried to explain this to my mom the other day; for me pushing is the worst part of the whole process. The pressure in immense and almost unbearable and for me when I can’t get on top of how I’m feeling, that’s when I lose control of things and all my relaxation and other techniques go right out the window and I start breathing too fast, and my muscles lock down and stay strained and tight, and the burning/stretching sensation of the head coming out is almost enough to do me in. Luckily for me, pushing has never lasted more than 10 minutes. Because of the way the contractions had gone, and my surprise at the doctor wanting me to start pushing, I thought this time pushing was going to take much longer. Thankfully I was wrong.
I still had the same panic attack I just described above, but after the first push, Dr. Thorpe said, “Good job, Krystal, you’re almost there, I can see the baby’s head, you’re almost done.” The baby’s head. That was like a light at the end of the tunnel for me, and it’s what I held on to. I screamed once (Aaron said it was a rather quiet scream), and kept pushing and trying to grit my teeth through the burning feeling. My doctor was great; he walked me through every step of the baby’s progress, which is exactly what I needed. I needed to know that progress what being made. Once the shoulders were out, Dr. Thorpe instructed me to look down through my legs, and I got to see the rest of the baby coming out. I’ve never done that before. I liked it. The baby looked like a little slimy gray and purple alien with a ton of dark gooey hair, but I loved watching every second of her coming out of me. My baby was here! I did it!
As always, after the baby is out, I felt a huge sense of relief and joy. I started sobbing (that’s not exactly the right word, since there were not tears, but that’s the closest word I can think of) and saying/whispering over and over almost uncontrollably, “My little girl, my little girl. I’m not pregnant anymore, I’m not pregnant anymore.”
While the doctor was delivering the placenta, he asked me how big my other kids were, so I told him Lincoln was 7 lbs 7 oz and Ivan as 8 lbs 3 oz. The doc said he was sure this little girl had them beat, and he wouldn’t be surprised if she were close to 9 lbs. I told him that now that she was out of me, she could be as big as she wanted. The nurse was cleaning her off and said it was a good thing she had some meat on her if she had two big brothers at home. Once they got her weighed though, everyone was really surprised that she was only (ONLY? Ha!) 8 lbs 5 oz, and 20 inches long. We decided it was because she had such chubby cheeks, that we all thought she would be bigger.
Then after looking at the stats on the computer, the nurse informed us that she had been born at 11:59pm and 55 seconds. Five seconds before midnight. So her birthday was August 3rd. I thought this was so cool. Maybe I’m a nerd, but isn’t it cool that her coming out just five seconds earlier determined her birthday? That can’t happen extremely often. I mean if you’re born at 3:59 and fifty-five seconds, who cares? It doesn’t change anything. But this time it did. And I’m happy to have my little girl with her birthday on the 3rd of August, instead of the 4th (which will be Kyle and Kelsey’s anniversary, so this way everyone gets their own special day). Besides, it’s easier to remember that our 3rd child was born on the 3rd. And this way hers and Lincoln’s birthdays are a whole week apart. : )
I was going to be proud that I didn’t have to have an episiotomy this time, but I tore and had to have stitches anyways, so I don’t really see the difference. After the doctor stitched me up, they handed me my beautiful baby girl.
Adelia Mae Swan. And she was beautiful. Lots and lots of dark hair, a perfectly round face, and chubby cheeks. I got to nurse her for about a half hour before they came to get her for her bath.
Aaron went with Adelia, and the nurse helped me get cleaned up and into the chair (they won’t let you walk on your own) to be wheeled down to the Mother/Baby floor. While we were doing all that the nurse gave me a very nice compliment. She told me I was the most controlled natural child birth mother she’d ever seen. And that she had been perfectly happy to let us do our thing, because of that. It was such a nice compliment, because not for one second during that whole process did I ever feel like the most in control. But that’s just good evidence that Heavenly Father had been with me and answering my prayers every step of the way through. He loved me and He cares and is aware of me, and He sent me a wonderful husband to coach me, and great doctors and nurses to help me though. And on top of that, He sent me the most beautiful baby girl I could ever imagine. I am so grateful.
I am also very grateful to all of our friends, neighbors, and family members who so willingly took care of our boys while we were in the hospital. That was another aspect I had stressed a lot over, because I knew that my mom (who usually helps) was going to (rightfully so) be occupied with Kyle’s wedding and unable to come down until it was over. But I shouldn’t have worried, everything was taken care of, and I’m so grateful to all of you for that.
When I saw Adelia again, she was all clean, and the nurses had done her hair so cute and put a little bow in it, which they let Aaron pick out, I was so proud of him. I’ve decided that the nurses must like girl babies more than boy babies because they made much more of a fuss over Adelia than they ever did over my boys. One of them even made us a really cute name tag to go in her little basket.
There wasn’t anything too exciting about our hospital stay. Aaron brought Lincoln and Ivan over for a bit in the morning. They were complete wild Indians, and would hardly hold still long enough to look at the new baby. Which I can’t really blame them, I suppose to a toddler a hospital room full of light switches and buttons and drawers and biohazard garbage cans is an extremely exciting place. But because of that, they didn’t get to stay very long.
The day we checked out (August 5th) we had Kyle and Kelsey stop by and visit on their way to their honeymoon in Vegas. I was so glad we got to see them and congratulate them on their marriage. I can’t wait to see the pictures from it. And my mom was also able to come down. We got to talk to Aaron’s parents and sister on the web cam which was a lot of fun. And we had a lot of phone calls and emails of congratulations.
We are home now, just enjoying our beautiful new baby girl. I’m sure they’ll be many more pictures and posts about her to come. But I wanted to get this birth story down while it was still fresh in my mind. We love you Adelia Mae and we are so happy to have you in our family!
13 comments:
I loved your story, great job! She is precious.
Hey congrats again. You are truly one amazing mother and will be great with three kids. I really admire you for it. I'm also very excited for you baby shower now that she is here. It will be good to see you again and see Adelia.
I love, love, love it! As someone who has never had kids, I appreciate your honesty, despite how revealing it is. I've got to say, one of your biggest flaws is lack of self-confidence. You do not give yourself enough credit. I read this entire post and think "WOW!!! What an amazing woman Krystal is! I could never do what she does, let alone with such pose and beauty." I am sincerely impressed with you and how strong you are. Heavenly Father, I'm sure, helped you along. But a lot of it is your personal strength. You are a STRONG woman and an inspiration to anyone. Thank you for sharing and congratulations on such an amazing story with an amazing baby :-) She is gorgeous
Congratulations!! We are so happy for you!! Love the story. I felt the same way about Tate- almost terrified of delivery, even though I've had two other babies! I think it is awesome that you can do it naturally. I wish I could. Anyways, she is darling. Congrats!
we are very happy for you and so glad that everything went so well and quick! She's a cutie! Congrats to the whole family!
Congratulations Krystal! What a beautiful little girl! You are amazing and I'm so glad that your labor/delivery went well.
She is sooo cute!!! I am so jealous of all her hair! She is a cutie and I can't wait to meet her!
Wow. What An inspiring story. I get really nervous about having this baby naturally but your honesty in your birth stories help me to have realistic expectations and to put faith and trust in myself and Heavenly Father. Thankyou for Sharing.
She is absolutely beautiful! I'm so happy for all of you. I can't wait to meet her!
It is fun for me to hear peoples' birth stories. Makes me sort of feel morbid or whatever but since I have never given birth before, I don't know what it's like. Anyway, congratulations on the new baby. She's adorable.
Wow Krystal, I love your story!! She is beautiful, Congratulations!
What a Beautiful little girl. She is PERFECT!!! I am in awe of you. You amaze me. I hope someday I can be as brave as you and have my next baby natural. What a cute little family you have. Congratulations.
congrats!!!! I am so glad everything went well for you. Best of luck. Have fun with your new little one.
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