Aaron and Lincoln enjoying their stew and lemonade while watching the DVDToday marks six years since my dad died of Leukemia. That seems like such a long time. It's hard to believe I was a junior in high school then, and now I'm married with one and a half kids. It kind of seems like my dad missed the biggest parts of my life, and I missed him at each of those events as well.
The year after he died our family friends, the Ropelatoes, started an awesome tradition that Aaron and I uphold still. Every year on November 13th we eat stew for dinner and lemon pie for dessert. Well, except last year Aaron and I decided we didn't really like lemon pie, so this year we did lemonade instead. We also watch a DVD I made for my mom for Christmas about 6 years ago. It has all the video clips I could find of my dad in our family home videos, and I put them all together to music, and also interviewed some friends and relatives and had them tell their favorite memories of my dad. All this is in the DVD we watch every year. Today is also a day for thinking about and sharing memories of my dad. I thought I would put a few on here.
The first memory that came to me today was kind of a random one. It was when I was in Jr. High, right after he hurt his back but before his surgery. My mom was at the gym, and I needed a ride to school early because I had an intramural basketball game. I remember going in to his room and asking for a ride, and so he got up and started to get dressed, but his back hurt so bad that he couldn't pull up his pants. The pain was so bad that tears came to his eyes. And I remember thinking how strange it was to see my big strong dad cry. I'd never seen it before then.
I remember at family parties, my dad wasn't the most fond of social events really, but he was always sociable in his own way. He'd come out and sit in the same chair at table and he'd stay there almost the whole night and let people come talk to him. While they were talking to him, he always told the same few jokes, and the same stories over and over. Everyone always laughed and thought he was funny, but my brothers and I probably heard them a million times. One of his favorite jokes "It's like I said to the one-eyed girl with the wooden leg...Keep and eye out for me, will ya Peg?" Most of his jokes were one liners like that. And a lot of them were not appropriate to repeat on the blog (swear words typically).
Every year at Christmas time my dad would take me shopping. This was a huge deal because normally my dad's shopping motto went "Get in, get what you need, and get out." But when he took me we spent a whole day together, looking at all the things I wanted to look at. The purpose for the trip was always to buy me a new Christmas dress. We always went to Nordstroms and my dad spared no expense. Not only did I get a dress, but shoes, tights, a dress coat to match, a hat if I wanted, gloves if I wanted, jewelry, the works. We shopped for my mom too, and my dad spared no expense on her either. I remember a lot of years we bought her duck purses. I'm sure that the purses have a brand name, but the logo on them was a duck, and so I always called them duck purses. They were leather and had all the accessories to go with. Why my mom needed more than one I don't know, but she got one every year for a few years in a row. And we always went to lunch afterwords at the restaurant of my choosing. Looking back it seemed that my dresses were too fancy to wear anywhere, even church, but I did anyways. It was great to spend that time with just me and my dad.
My dad always had some project going, and usually he started these projects while my mom was out of the house. I remember one year she took us trick-or-treating, and when we came back my dad had knocked out a wall and decided to turn one of the upstairs bedrooms into an office/library. Another time, my mom took me to a softball tournament down in St. George and when we came back my dad had purchased a huge new big screen TV. This was after he'd been diagnosed with cancer, and the contract on the TV said if Dad died before he paid for the TV (I think he had set it up to make payments on it) then he didn't have to pay for it. As it turned out, we got that TV almost for free. There were other projects too, and when my dad was really in to something he'd go buy a whole bunch of book about it and then start his project. One such project was our 95 gallon salt water fish tank. We had about 800 books on salt water fish. He got the tank all set up the way he liked, with the filter he wanted and the lighting and on and on, and then he thought it would be cool to bring back some real ocean corral from Hawaii and have in the tank. So he did, and it was a big ordeal getting the coral in a cooler and carrying on on the airplane (which would never fly today) and got the coral home and put it in the tank. Well, come to find out, living in the coral was a spear shrimp. It killed all the fish within a month. That was pretty much the end of the fish tank after that. Other on-going projects included landscaping the back yard, pruning the trees in the front yard, the cabana (aka the hut for the sauna and hot tub in our back yard), the boys' pinewood derby cars, and on and on.
Here is a video, actually it's a video of a video, so sorry about the quality. But I think this video shows a pretty decent sketch of my dad's personality (at least the fun part of it). Ok, maybe I should explain a tiny bit more before you all think my dad is a pyscho. My mom and dad had a dinner group with 5 other couples, and once a month this group gets together and each month one of the couples is in change of planning the activity. Well, the month this video was taken, the couple in charge decided to do a "dinner and a movie" theme, and each of the couples had to bring a home-made commercial to play and whoever had the best commercial got a prize or something. This is what my parents came up with. Pretty clever if I do say so myself. I think they won too.
So, those are a few of my memories this year. If you have any memories of my dad you'd like to share, please feel free to comment, I would love to hear them, good or bad! :)
12 comments:
Seven years? Wow, I did not think that it has been that long. That is so hard and I am sure that every year this is a hard time.
Congrats on another little boy! That is so much fun! There is nothing cuter than two best buddy brothers!
Wow, I can't believe it's been seven years. I don't have a lot of memories of your dad specifically- just being around him when our families would get together. I remember he and my dad would just sit in their blue chairs and drink their O' Douls. I don't think my dad drinks that anymore. It was probably something special between them. I remember skipping Stake Conference and having barbecues at your house. I always thought your dad must have the greatest job, because your house was so cool. I always liked looking at the picture of your mom and dad in your dining room. I remember how broken up my dad was after yours passed away. It's nice to hear some of your memories of him, and I think it's really great about your tradition.
Your stories are so cute and amazing. I'm glad that you have so many good things to remember your Father by. I'm sure he is really proud of the mother you are and how close you are with your family.
That video clip of your dad was great. I had forgotton all about doing those commercials. It was a lot of fun. One of my favorite memories of your dad is how great a friend he was to Jeremy. He would always pull money out of Jer's ear. Another one was at Jeremy's baptism. He gave a talk on baptism. When he was done, he gave the printed talk to Jeremy so that he could keep it. Of course being a mom, I took it away so that it would stay nice. I still remember your dad saying, "I knew that Jacque would do that, so I made another copy just for Jeremy." Then he handed him another copy of the talk. Last but not least, my next memory is of our last trip together. We went to Glacier National Park. I remember walking with Wes and your parents trying to find Jackson and Joshua because they went out of radio range!
I always remember you dad the strong silent type, and the one liners. what a good man. I remember when I found out that he had passed away. My heart sank for you and your family. I am so happy to see your family keeping his memory alive! Stew and Lemonade, what a great combo.
Your dad sounds like a great man, I can't wait to meet him someday! Thanks for sharing such sweet memories with us.
Okay, so I have a few memories of good old Uncle Stew. One of my favorites though was one day for tumbling it was my mom's day to drive home, so she drops off you, Kyle, and Jack and we drive home. Well the next thing we know not even 30 minutes later we get a knock on our door, so we open it and it's your dad with Jack and Kyle standing on each side of him both of them all teary eyed and heads hanging. Then your dad says "I brought my boys over to tell you something." Then they procede to apolgize for being roundy in our car. Ha ha, you had gone home and were so annoyed with how your brothers were acting in the car that you told your dad and he took care of business. I don't even remember them being any more roundy than usual. Ha ha.
Stew was always so welcoming and friendly to me. I couldn't help but love and adore him, seriously like an uncle or something. Everytime I would come over he would greet me and want to know the details of my little unimportant life. Whenever I got in the car with the boys, I would always get to choose the first song we listened to..... Men in Black by Will Smith, I still remember. (It was hip when we were in elementary.)
I remember Nov 13th six years ago VERY vividly. It was a hard day, but you and your family were so so so strong. I will always remember the strength and the faith that you all had. Stew raised a wonderful daughter and he is so proud of you Krys, how could he not be! You should be proud of the way you have held his standards. :)
Love ya Stew, sure do miss you!!! But we'll see ya soon!!
With all my love, Jord :)
Your dad...and my dad, what a mix. I remember them cracking jokes and thinking they were the funniest people on earth. And usually that joke was directed towards one of us kids. Needless to say, I think I rolled my eyes a lot back in those days.
I also remember how they would "send" stuff to each other on their PDA's during sacrament meeting and when Larry was around, they all become mischievous little boys. Who knows all of the pranks they played!
But your dad is a great man and I'm sure he has watched every moment and event of your life, loving every minute! Especially his adorable little grandson! What a wonderful tradition to celebrate your dad!
This post made me cry... I can't believe it's been so long! It seems like yesterday. My favorite memories of your dad was from tumbling matches. You guys would always take me and he'd bring your trailer for us to eat and play in in-between events. He was always so sweet to me and bought me treats... I loved that guy! I have nothing but fond memories of him :-)
I'm thinking about you today, your blog touched my heart.
Well where do I start. Six years has been a very long time it seems and yet I remeber it as if it were yesterday. It was the hardest day of my life up to this point. I guess the great thing that we have are the memories. I could take forever on that but I will just share a few. You had a great Dad. He loved you kids more than anythiing in the world. He would have done anyting for you. I remember how excited he always got when I informed him of each new arrival. He loved going on trips camping and hiking and showing you kids alll aobut rocks and plants and all the animals. I remember every year going to yellowstone and sitting for hours just so you kids could get a glimpse at a bear. We would always go to all your sporting events. All over the state of Utah and beyond. I remeber driving the motorhome down Las vegas boulevard be cause we were staying at circus circus but driving all the way across town to get to Kyles basketball tournament. All the many trips to mesquite to your softball tournaments. I remember the one that we forgot the time cahnge and were there and hour early but Dad wasn't mad he being the early riser he was thought it a great opportunity for you and he to get in some extra throwing. I remeber him being so sick he could hardly stand and going to watch Jackson play football anyway. Being the loudest cheerleader there. Hime spending all the time he could reading to Tanner and them watching Tom and Jerry togeather. But most of all I guess I remeber his great love of the gospel which tied his family togeather and how much he wanted us to act and live so that we could be togeather forever. Yep I think he has great hopes for our family and I think that he is thrilled with his grandbaby and he will yet send many more our way. I don't really celebrate the 13th because I don't love that day but I will celebrate with you a week later on his birthday 11-20 celebrate the life he lived and thank heaven his eternal life. love ya Mom
Ok, I know I'm late back off! Its hard to get on these types of things in Guatelandia.
Stew and pretty much anything lemon flavored doesnt really exist here but I do have some memories to share.
One of my favorite things that Dad and I used to do together was play the computer. I know mom hated it and still to this day hates it but I remember that we used to stay up all night some night playing StarCraft. And this is when the kids computer was in Krystal's old room (now Tanner's, I think still who know's I'm in Guate). I remember we got in trouble from te girls more than once for playing too late and being to loud.
I also remember the visible change that was wrought in him during his time in the hospital. Not in his appearance but in his countenance. I didn't really grasp it then, but being here on the mission and remember certain aspects of him when he was in the hospital. He almost always had his scriptures or some other church book or lesson near his bed, and always had insights to share. I wish I was aware at the time and had paid more attention to what he had to offer, but I can say this, his teaching and his looking after his family and loved ones has not stopped.
Another great memory I have is how he would always support us to the maximum in whatever we loved. I don't know how many basketball camps he signed me up for because he knew I loved them. And when he would pick Shawn and I up from Tom CHamber's Camp, we'd always go to Sizzler. Shawn would always get Lemon Chicken and me and Dad would always get steak.
Last memory, I remember that Dad was everything to me. Because no matter what I said I needed his approval. The phrase 'Huh Dad?' was probably the most common I used when I was little.
Anyways.. There are many many more but these are the ones that came to mind. Sorry its late but I dont think Dad really would like the fuss anyways... 'Huh Dad?'
Elder Kyle S. Lemmon
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