Common Core

I'd never even heard about the Common Core Initiative, until tonight. I've been doing some reading on it, and I think it's something people need to be aware of. I found this blog entry (pasted below) about it, that I think explains it pretty well, as well as explaining why it's scary. I am not a big fan of the federal government, and prefer that it have as little control over me as possible. I signed the petition to get Utah out of the Common Core asap. But you can read below and see what you think.

Dear Teachers and Schools,

April 15, 2012

Dear Teachers and Schools,

I'm a Utah teacher.  I've taught 3rd grade for two years, high school English for five years, and college English at Utah Valley University for two years.  Teachers often stay neutral on political issues. But the Common Core Initiative affects what millions of children will be taught and what future educators will be able to teach for many years to come, not only in Utah but in a majority of U.S. states.

I'm concerned about Utah educators' sustained freedom under the rules of the Common Core Initiative (CCI) and its testing arm, the SBAC. The experimental educational ideas of the Common Core State Standards (CCSS standards) --not identical to Utah's current version of Common Core-- come with few benefits and CCI has many long term liabilities to local freedom and values.

As an English teacher, I dislike the way the CCSS standards dramatically slash the percentage of classic literature permitted to be taught (to be replaced with info-texts). You might be thinking:  "but Utah uses the Utah Common Core, not the CCSS standards; so who cares?" Hold on; I will explain below how Utah's standards won't matter by 2015 in the "WestEd" paragraph below.

We Can Keep What We Like About CCI:

Many teachers do not realize that all the new standards that Utah started to implement this year were available in public domain; we did not need Common Core.  If we choose to sever ties with the Common Core Initiative and its testing arm to ensure freedom from federal or consortia controls, we are still free to use anything that's in the public domain, including the standards of Common Core.  But we should write standards under our own sovereign state power, as the Constitution requires. (If you are thinking:  "But this is a state-led initiative, not a federal initiative," hold on.  I will explain below, how the state-led claim is  technically true but not functionally true.)

The marketing of Common Core has been so excellent that very few people question it.  I attended last week's State School Board meeting and realized that even at the administrative and state level, very few people have taken time to read the legally binding documents of Common Core and its accompanying testing and data collection arm, that I have studied.  These documents testify that Utah has given up her freedom over education, yet I feel alone in my sense of urgency to investigate this issue.  (Documents attached if you care to read them)

Common versus Sovereign:

As a high school English teacher, I loved "Harrison Bergeron" by Kurt Vonnegut, a short story that begins as if it were introducing 2012 and the Common Core Initiative:

"THE YEAR WAS 2081, and everybody was finally equal. They weren't only equal before God and the law. They were equal every which way. Nobody was smarter than anybody else. Nobody was better looking than anybody else. Nobody was stronger or quicker than anybody else. All this equality was due to the 211th, 212th, and 213th Amendments to the Constitution, and to the unceasing vigilance of agents of the United States Handicapper General."

 Like the society in "Harrison Bergeron," Utah has volunteered to be bound to in-commonness at the expense of freedom and innovation.  Utah has agreed to a system of nationalized standards and assessments in which Utah has little or no voice. Utah must submit to the consensus of a consortium of states on key educational decisions. There are many ways in which Common Core impacts Utah's sovereignty over educational decisions.

There's ample proof that Utah has given away her own freedom  over education to federal and consortium control.  There is evidence (see "WestEd" below) that the current "Utah Common Core" will be swapped for the non-amendable CCSS.  The federal CCSS will rule, bringing with it the already determined slashes to the percentage of allowable classic literature (in favor of info texts) and other yet-to-be-determined changes, not amendable by us. There is no way for Utah or any state to control what is contained in, or will change in, the CCSS.

Federal Control:

The Common Core Initiative is a movement that claims to be completely free of federal controls, claims to be a "state-led" raising of educational standards, and claims to promote college readiness.

As you know, Utah joined CCI in 2009 and implementation will be complete in 2015. But did you know that Utah did not seek out CCI?  We joined both CCI and SBAC because the federal government incentivized it. Joining meant we got more points toward winning a competitive grant called Race to the Top.  We didn't win that grant-- not a penny-- but we are still bound to CCI and SBAC.  South Carolina Senator Mike Fair calls this error that South Carolina, Utah and other states made, a selling of our educational birthright without even getting the mess of pottage.  It's hard to sever ties.  In fact, you need (among many other things) federal approval to withdraw.

Common Core requires states to accept common standards, to which states may only add 15% more. (But that 15% will never be tested by the common test).

The U.S. Dept. of Education funded (and works closely with) each group that played a role in developing the national standards and both consortia contracted to write tests to CCSS standards. The U.S. DOE closely supervises data collected by the tests. The groups who did this educational work (that the federal government was not constitutionally  allowed to do) were groups paid by federal grants. They include West Ed, Achieve, Inc., The National Governors' Association, and the Council of Chief State School Officers. The U.S. DOE holds tight control over the tests and has requirements for each group of states to coordinate tests "across consortia," to give status updates and to provide access to information about the tests to the U.S. DOE on "an ongoing basis." (See "SBAC Cooperative Agreement.")

The standards themselves are not unquestionably high across disciplines.  Texas opted out of Common Core because it had higher math standards already and didn't want the 3 billion dollar implementation cost of adding Common Core. Massachusetts actually lowered state math standards by joining Common Core. Professor Sandra Stotsky, who served on the Common Core Validation Committee, refused to sign off that the English standards were authentic for college prep. Stanford Professor Michael Kirst said: "the standards for college and career readiness are essentially the same. This implies the answer is yes to the question of whether the same standards are appropriate for 4 year universities, 2 year colleges, and technical colleges. The burden of proof for this assertion rests with CCSSO/NGA, and the case is not proven".

The CCSS are common, one-size-fits-all standards that restrict local innovation, and the ability to further raise standards, regardless of whether the standards are currently higher or lower. The tests that go with the standards don't allow local innovating either. Since educational standards and decisions are meaningless without political freedom, there is little sense in analyzing whether the Utah Common Core standards are now better or worse;  Utah can't control any aspect of the CCSS.

There are two sets of standards (Utah Common Core & Common Core State Standards) that Utah will need to choose between and only the first  has an amendment process. See "WestEd" below.

SBAC is the Smarter Balanced Assessment Consortium.  Utah belongs to this group, but the state in charge (and the fiscal agent) is Washington State.  Although Utah received no money from the Race to the Top grant, collectively the SBAC did win a grant to develop a testing system. Utah is bound to obey the terms of the SBAC's grant which include many freedom-closing mandates and expensive requirements. As a condition of the grant, all member states must adopt the Common Core (CCSS federal standards) No analysis has been done by Utah on CCI/SBAC implementation costs.

USOE,  the Utah State Office of Education, is a powerful office. Yet the USOE did not legally analyze Common Core; it was flatly accepted as true doctrine.  A USOE lawyer told me a few days ago that she thought that the "Cooperative Agreement" I referred her to didn't exist or was a hoax.  After I sent her the PDF, she then changed her response and said she disagreed with my interpretation of it.

The same USOE lawyer answered my question: "Why is there no amendment process for the CCSS standards?" by saying: "The whole point is to get to a place where there is a 'common core' - that would mean the same standards for all the states that adopt it.  If the states had the freedom to 'disagree' and 'change' them, I guess they would no longer be 'common'."  So freedom is not a priority to the USOE legal team.

The day after she wrote me that email, a directive went out at the USOE that no one (the legal department included) was allowed to answer further questions from me, a Utah teacher asking appropriate questions. They were told to direct me to the Public Relations department. So then I wrote to the Utah Attorney General for help and am still waiting for his response.

Another teacher, a friend, and I visited the Governor in his office two weeks ago to plead with him to reject Common Core.  We talked, gave him a binder and a jump drive containing evidence that federal control and consortia-control of Common Core jeopardized Utah's educational freedoms, and asked him to sever ties with CCI and SBAC.  He said we were confusing him and promised to have us back in three weeks with Superintendent Shumway and his lawyer in the room.  (I can keep you posted.)

WestEd  - As the project manager/test writer for the SBAC, WestEd holds an important role in the CCI.  I wrote a letter to WestEd in which I inquired, "Please help me understand how the individual standards of a member state of SBAC will still be relevant in light of the fact that all the SBAC states take the same test. For example, if  Colorado added 15% more calculus to their math standards than the federal standards had, while Utah added 15%  more geometry, how will those individual state standards be addressed by the test?  If the WestEd's test contains neither Colorado's calculus nor Utah's geometry, because their standards were actually higher than those of the federal government's, how will the test benefit the SBAC states?"

WestEd replied, " If a state chooses to add their state-specific 15% to the Consortium test, then that additional information can be included in their  local reporting, but is not considered the Smarter Balanced test.  In order for this system to have a real impact within a state the state will need to adopt the Common Core State Standards (i.e., not have two sets of standards). As a condition of the grant, all member states participating in the assessment must adopt the Common Core."

Did you catch that?  "…Not have two sets of standards".  What happens when states want to compete for high scores on a common test?  They will need to teach to the same set of standards that the test uses.

Why haven't we been told more about Common Core?  Hypothesis:  Superintendent Larry Shumway sits on the board of WestEd. He also sits on two of the boards that contracted the development of the CCSS standards. It's not strange that he has not provided transparency for Utahns about Common Core's mandates and costs.

A Spiral of Silence 

Marketing of Common Core has been target-specific. The national PTA received a two million dollar donation to actively promote Common Core. But CCI proponents didn't promote it outside the school system and CCI was never up for public vote or legislative input. It slid under taxpayer, parental, and legislative radar.  The Governor told my friend he did not recall having signed it.  He probably trusted those around him to do their homework.

Even though CCI was funded by, and is largely controlled by, the federal government, it was labeled a "state-led initiative." The federal government paid groups to do what it was not constitutionally permitted to do.  The Congressional Budget Office never could do a cost analysis and the taxpaying public was kept in the dark. Remember, the Constitution and G.E.P.A. laws clearly forbid the federal government from controlling or making decisions related to states' education.

If teachers or administrators don't like CCI,  they don't dare speak against it because it's been handed down as an unassailable doctrine of raising school standards. They fear losing their jobs by speaking out.

There is a survey that must be taken by anyone hoping to apply as a candidate for the Utah State School Board.  The very first question is:  "Do you support Common Core?" Can anyone who does not agree with Common Core be elected to the State School Board?

Fight for Educational Freedom

The Common Core question comes down to this: would Utah rather have education in common with a majority of other states, under the partial or full control of others' ideas about what is good for our kids, or would Utah prefer to have sovereignty to make educational decisions?

A great American, Ezra Benson, said: "I say to you with all the fervor of my soul that God intended men to be free. Rebellion against tyranny is a righteous cause. It is an enormous evil for any man to be enslaved to any system contrary to his own will… once freedom is lost, only blood –human blood – will win it back."

There is a petition that Utahns are signing to sever ties with CC/SBAC.   Links to documentable evidence are available at  http://utahnsagainstcommoncore.com and http://whatiscommoncore.wordpress.com (my own blog) as well as athttp://commoncorefacts.blogspot.com/.

Please consider the long term impacts of Common Core and let your Utah School Board, Superintendent Shumway, and Governor Herbert know how you feel.  Now is our window of opportunity.  If we wait, we'll be too financially and in other ways invested to withdraw from Common Core.

Thank you for your time.

Christel Swasey

Utah Teacher

Assorted

The following are a collection of assorted thoughts from out of my head:

 -I'm getting antsy about my garden. I keep feeling like we need to plant, or be getting ready to plant. But we can't do anything until we have the yard rough graded (which means make it level). The guys is supposed to come some time this week with his Bobcat to do it. After that I hope we can do a few raised beds out of cinder block. After the yard is graded, Aaron can start putting in the sprinkler system too. Then once the sprinklers are in, we can soft grade it and then put in the grass. Depending on how long it takes Aaron to get the sprinklers in, we may or may not have grass this year. But I'm okay with that, as long as we can get the garden in. (The garden is not dependent on the sprinklers being in, we can always water it by hand.)

-Finally got a square wood dowel for the sliding glass door. It's amazing how much safer I feel at night with that thing in.

-Finally went into Rod Works. Wow. I could spend a lot of money there. I found a few things I'd like to go back and get that would look really nice with my subway art on my front wall. I'm doing my house in yellow, red, green, and orange fall colors. I've always been an earth tones person.

 -Potty training is going...well, it's going. Ivan does really good in the mornings. He can go all morning, most every day without an accident. But after nap time it's like banging my head into a brick wall. And, of all weird things, the middle of the night....like 2am...is the only time he can (or will) tell me that he needs to go. At all normal hours of the day it's a complete guessing game. I have trained him to take care of his own accidents though, at least the wet ones. He knows to go upstairs, take off his wet stuff, put it in the laundry room, get in the tub, wash his legs off, and then find new underwear and pants for himself. I figure, I'm not the one having accidents, so as much as possible, I'd like very much not to be the one cleaning them up.

-Finished reading Stuart Little by E.B. White as a read-aloud with the kids. It wasn't my favorite. I liked Charlotte's Web much better. Next we're going to read The Wonderful Flight to the Mushroom Planet by Eleanor Cameron. I remember loving this one as a kid, and since my kids are really into space and astronauts, I think they'll like it too. After that I think we'll read the BFG by Roald Dahl.

-Isn't it great that each of us has our own different abilities and talents? I've been coming to this realization lately, and I think it's awesome. It's ok, if my strengths are not the strengths of others, and more importantly, it is ok if I have weaknesses where others have strengths. For example, I have quite a few friends and whenever anyone needs help, they are very quick to offer to take care of children. "Do you need help? I'll take your kids." Kind of a thing. And I've always felt bad because for me, watching kids is about that last thing I will usually volunteer to do. I'm more of a "Do you need help? I'll make you dinner." kind of a person. I struggle with the kid watching, especially if it's going to be more than a one-time thing. I have a friend who watches someone else's kids as a favor for several hours one night every week indefinitely, and in my mind that qualifies her for the Celestial Kingdom, because it's not something I could sign myself up for. And I've always felt like I'm lacking because of it. Then the other day I was talking to another friend, and she was telling me about how she feels very strongly that taking care of others' kids is one of her talents and abilities in life. And it was like a light bulb clicked on for me. I'd never thought about the ability to give that type of service as a talent before. But it totally is. And it's not one I have! Maybe there are people on this earth, who struggle as much with bringing a meal, or cleaning a house, or doing yard work, as I struggle with watching kids. And it's ok! All types of services need to be provided at one time or another. Heavenly Father gave us all different talents and asks us to use our talents to help people. That means I should use the talents I do have to help, rather than feel bad about the ones I don't have. And yes, I do watch kids sometimes, and there are some kids that are a lot easier to have than others, and I feel like I make those judgements as they come up. But it's not something I regularly volunteer to do, and now I'm learning that it's ok because I have different talents that allow me to serve in other ways. So, to make a long thought short, I'm glad to know that Heavenly Father didn't make us all exactly that same. I'm glad there is diversity so that all kinds of needs can be met. I don't know if this even makes sense, but there it is. 

-Found out that a coworker who Aaron is pretty good friends with, and his wife, are in the process of buying the house across the street from us. I hope it works out for them, that would be cool.

-Tried to freeze some roll dough a couple weeks ago. Took them out Sunday, thinking they'd work just as well as Rhodes' Rolls...I was sorely disappointed. They didn't raise much, and they tasted gross. I need to do some research and figure out how to freeze dough so that it will work. It would save a lot of space to be able to freeze dough rather than already cooked rolls, and it would save time to have frozen dough rather than having to mix dough all the time for fresh rolls. Any suggestions?

-I am determined that, after we get rid of all the people's stuff that's being stored at our house that's not ours, we will no longer be a storage unit. I'm having a hard enough time storing all the baby clothes we are not currently using. They take up so much space! I think it's the move, it's put me in a throw-everything-away kind of mood.

-I don't know about you, but I'm ready for warm weather.

-We recently bought the kids Fox in Socks by Dr. Seuss. I didn't read it before we bought it. I had no idea it was a giant tongue twister waiting to happen. My kids love me to read it to them, I can't figure out way. I get so tripped up on the words, that I can't tell if they get anything out of it. It's funny. I'm starting to memorize parts of it because I've read it so many time to the kids, and I'm discovering that saying it from memory is WAY easier than trying to read it, my tongue doesn't get nearly as tangled. So I wonder if the tongue twister has something to do with the actual act of reading, rather than talking. Hmmmm....

-Lincoln's just a few pages away from finishing Explode the Code workbook 1. He's done really well with it, and he likes doing it. Lots of times I tell him to go play in the play room for quiet time, and then find him in the school room instead doing his workbook all by himself for fun. Whatever floats his boat, I guess. We just received workbook 2 in the mail, and he can't wait to get started on it.

- I keep thinking I need to make some kind of devotional chart/schedule to start out our homeschool day with. Nothing elaborate, but maybe just a prayer, a song (the one they're currently learning in Primary for that month), a scripture (again the one that goes along with the primary theme of the month), and maybe an article of faith. If I kept it simple, then it would be doable, and I think it would really help us focus and start the day off well.

-Speaking of primary...I miss my primary calling :( It's been so weird the last couple of weeks to have to sit for two straight hours.

Aaron is Not the Only One Making Things Around Here

Aaron was out of town for a couple days last week, so the kids and I went up to my mom's to get crafty. I've been really liking subway art lately. I've seen all kinds floating around out there, but I know that it's probably a good idea to only put up one piece of Subway art per house, so I've been searching for just the right one. I saw something similar to this on Pintrest, and knew I had to make one for myself.

I bought the board and the stain at Home Depot, and stained it the night before going up to Hooper. In Hooper my mom and I did the yellow with Swan at the top (she did the stippling, I had no idea what that was or how to do it). Then we used her Cricut machine to cut out all the vinyl  letters in the different sizes and fonts. It took an entire day, but I'm very pleased with it. It's going to be the main piece on the wall right as you walk in the front door. Right now it's the only piece...but eventually I'll decorate around it, and then hopefully the living room will start to feel more homey, and less like an office cubical.

(Eventually, eventually Aaron has drawn some plans to build himself a nice desk, and when that happens we'll move the desk/computer into the family room, and buy some furniture and a piano for the living room, but that's all a very long ways down the road.)

Our Easter Activity

I did get my act together enough last week to do one Easter centered activity with the kids before the actual day.

We talked about how Christ died and was resurrected and how because of him we will all be resurrected too after we did. Easter is in the spring time when everything is getting a new life. Because we can be resurrected and because we can repent, Christ as given us a new life too. So spring reminds us of Christ in that way.

Then we did a little chick art project, so remind us of new life. I thought it turned out cute.

Ivan's and Lincoln's on top, mine and Adelia's on bottom.

Letter Day: R is for Rodeo!

A couple weeks ago, I hosted Letter Day and did the letter R. I decided to do a rodeo theme. I dressed the kids up like cowboys. Then I had them ride a horse. Next we did barrel racing I step up three pots in the living room and gave them a stick horse (a stuffed Eeore from Winnie the Pooh tied to a foam T-ball bat with a ribbon) and had them race around the barrels.

Then we did cow roping. They had to ride the stick horse across the room to Suzy, who was holding a stuffed animal cow, and they had to wrap the cow in rope and then race back to the other side of the room. Suzy did a great job of making it a challenge by having the cow move around so it was difficult to rope.

Next I had the kids pretend to be bulls. I was a rodeo clown and waved a red handkerchief  at them and they had to try to catch me.

Then I told them about how sometimes at rodeos, they let a bunch of roosters run wild int he arena and people (usually kids) get to come down and try to catch them. So we pretended to be roosters, and let Adelia and Ryan try to catch us. It was a hoot.

To wrap things up, we went to the table and colored a big R that was wearing cowboy boots and a hat. 

Garage Shelves

There's no use trying to hide it, my husband is pretty amazing. And that's a fact. He spent the weekend making garage shelves. It's so nice to have some things organized and some space cleared out in the garage. For the first time in 6 years we get to park our car in the garage. Yay!

It's a tight fit, and there's still lots more stuff that needs to be organized, moved, returned to it's rightful owner, and gotten rid of, but our van officially lives in the garage now. I love being a home owner.

And here's Daddy's little helper. I think she spent almost as much time in the garage as he did on Saturday.

Also this weekend, we had the pleasure of having our two good friends Tindy and Ben come and stay Friday night with us. They were in town doing a wedding photo shoot, and we got lucky enough to snatch them away from work for some dinner Friday night. Then Saturday afternoon, Tindy and I left Aaron and Ben with the kids and ran over to check out Rod Works, a home decor store. I've always wanted to go in there, but never been willing to drag three kids along. It's as awesome as I imagined it would be...dangerous place, if you have any money to spend. I'll be going back some day.

Sunday evening we had Kelly and Esther and Asher and Ryan and Melissa over for dinner. We always love a family party, and wished everyone else could have been there too. We did get to see Stacey and Rob and their kids today though. They stopped by on their way to Salt Lake. Lisa and Sydni and families, and Chuck and Debbie, we missed you guys! When are we all getting together this year?

Pieces of Me

Poetry. One of those pieces of me that has gotten lost, and almost forgotten about, in the shuffle of wivery (is that a word? The act of being a wife...wivery? It is now.) and motherhood. As I was unpacking and going through some things, I found an old binder with some poetry in it that I wrote in high school. I also wrote a lot of poetry when I was in college too, but I can't find any of those poems anywhere. Which is really too bad, because those ones are a little better, I think, and I would like to read them again. Anyways, it was still fun reading the ones from high school. Some of them were silly, some were exercises where I was playing around with a certain form or style, and some of them are just plain garbage. I think, though, that I will share a few. Remember I was 17 when I wrote these. :)

My Heart and Soul
by Krystal Lemmon

The pen and ink, my heart and soul
Devoted to the written word;
Feelings caught on a paper bowl.

When life becomes a bitter curd
To write relaxes and relieves,
What was complex appears absurd.

A dream world on the page conceives
Silver arches bracing trials
Man can press on now, he believes.

Journals contain thought as a vial
Holds liquid; saving it for later.
Make memories through beguile.

Words to me: paint to a painter
Beauty is finding the right one
Pen and ink to my desires will cater.

His Message
By Krystal Lemmon

To win feels good if worked for;
Losing can be productive.
Out of situations more
Is acquired through positive
Thinking than by going through
The motions learning nothing.
Hard arduous trials too
Refine and perfect something
Which otherwise would lack
That compelling quality.
When on winning streaks don't slack;
Developing amenity
By settling with what's been done
Is most harmful. Set high goals
For thyself, accomplish one
At a time. Temptation pulls
Thee, but keep they dreams in mind.
Don't forfeit long term ambitions
Because today you were blind
With veneer joy's compensations.
My contract does not promise
A lifetime of effortlessness
Or peace, for there is a price.
Easiness I ne'er did express
To thee, that is not my way.
But offer thee comfort
That thy struggles will someday 
In my kingdom prove thy worth.


Writer's Block is Like...
by Krystal Lemmon

Force-feeding an infant.
You wouldn't eat that
Mush of goopy imitation
Vegetables either. The
Brat wails when the lid
Comes off releasing a musty
Sick-to-your-stomach whiff.
Yet still you take a spoonful
And try to coax it in his mouth.
But for all your happy gestures,
Or imitation baby language and
Airplane noises, the green/orange
Glop of yuck is spit right back
Into your face mixed with drooling
Criticism. And that wide-eyed
Innocent thing laughs at your
Dismay, as a subtle reminder
That this garbage isn't good enough.

Tall, Dark, and Sarcastic
by Krystal Lemmon

Towering tall stretching with stars
Head higher fabricates farsightedness
Benefiting your view.

Witty words and sarcastic sentences;
Concealed compliments flow freely
From your vocal mind.

Long locks, brown boyish, and curly
Waking wisps dangle down
Over your ears.

Eyes alter, cerulean to cobalt
Sparkle, splashing, excitement exaggerated
When you're amused.

Locked lids display delight in
Cuddling comfortably, braking breath
You're so relaxed.

Arms assured enclose me easily,
Pleasantly pillowed, ceaselessly satisfied
Against your shoulder.

Teasing, tantalizing; mocking, messing around
Obscurely uncover myriad meanings
All of them good.

Conversation continues without wanting more
Two together works well
For both of us.

That's enough for today. Maybe another day, when I'm feeling nostalgic about the things I can't seem to find the time to do anymore, I'll post some more. There are lots of poems. I miss the ability to take an emotion, or a thought, or an experience, and twist it into something (more or less) beautiful, and feel like there is a mode of expression that can at least semi-accurately capture the things that are on the inside of yourself. But writing poetry takes lots of time. Lots of quiet time, lots of reflecting, lots of editing and changing. And those long stretches of solitude seem to escape me these days...but maybe some day I'll get back to that place.

Easter Fun 2012

Easter 2012

We spend Easter up in Hooper with my family. Even though church was at 9am, we managed to be ready and have time to take a family picture. Yay us.

We gave the kids their Easter baskets before church. Adelia liked her hat the best, and Lincoln was thrilled with his CTR ring, and Ivan was happiest with the jelly beans I think.

I can't get enough of this kid and her chubby white legs. She kept posing for the camera and cracking me up.

We had an excellent dinner, that included our traditional lamb, tasty rolls, funeral potatoes, salad, and mine and Aaron's contribution of strawberry lemonade. All the food was fabulous. We ate a lot.

Afterwards, Gramma Tam and Papa Kerry set up and egg hunt for the grandkids.

The anticipation...

The hunt

The loot

And since it was such a beautiful 70 degree day (you'd never know we had a blizzard on Friday), we stayed outside the rest of the time we were there enjoying the sand box, trampoline, and sunshine.

Mom, Kyle, and Kels

Emree is here!

Introducing my newest niece...Emree Kay Lemmon, daughter of Jackson and Brooke. She was born on Friday April 6th. 7 pounds 13 ounces 20 and a half inches long. Aaron and I got to go see her Saturday night. She's perfect. I love being an aunt!

Easter Thoughts 2012

I enjoyed Easter Sunday. We were at my mom's and so were Kyle and Kelsey and Steph and Kirk. We all went together to my mom's ward. That means, there were lots of extra adults for my kids to go back and forth between, and I actually got to listen quite a bit to the messages that were shared.

I love going back to my mom's ward. It's the ward I grew up in for 18 years, and so many of the people who had a part in raising me are still there. Lots of my YW leaders, Sunday school and primary teachers, bishops, neighbors, parents of friends, and friends. I love to visit with them and remember how each one of them touched my life in some way. I know a lot of them worried about me as a teenager and wondered if I'd ever get a clue and grow up. I hope that when they see me come to visit with my husband and family, that they remember that they had influences here and there on who I turned out to be. And that it's largely due to them as a whole, not to mention my amazing parents who also played a big part (obviously), that taught me the things I needed to know, so that in the long run, I could make good choices, and end up sealed to a wonderful husband and three terrific kids. I'm not perfect by any stretch of the imagination, but I'd say I'm doing all right. It really does take a village to raise a child, and Hooper did me well. I think about this every time I go back for a visit.

In Sunday School the lesson was about Enos. Kerry taught and did a great job. The first thought I had during the lesson, was that you never read the scriptures the same way twice. It's not possible. You can read the same stories, and the same versus, but every time you do, you are approaching it in a different frame of mind. You are in a different place in your life, than you were the last time you read it. Different things are happening to you, different emotions, different struggles, different needs, etc. Maybe you've gained a lot more knowledge since the last time you read a particular part, and that knowledge adds a unique insight. Maybe you have a new perspective, for whatever reason. But I think this is good. I think this is why we are counseled to read the scriptures daily, because even if we read it cover to cover a million and one times, it's a different book with every reading, because we are different people.  What a blessing.

My friend Dawn gave a good lesson in Relief Society too. We went over the crucifixion, and as we read different scriptures we picked out all the different things that Christ suffered and she put them up on the bored. Words like: scourged, mocked, beaten, betrayed, denied, and so forth. And as I looked at the board, I thought, we suffer some of those same things in our lives, not to the extent that Christ did, but I can think of times that I was betrayed or mocked, for example. But Christ knows all of our hurts, physical or emotional, because he went through it all for us. And at the end of it all Christ forgave, "Father forgive them for they know not what they do." Every since General Conference, Elder Uchtdorf's Stop it! talk has been going through my head, and I realize I need to be more forgiving and let things go. Not big things, I'm not currently in a feud with anyone, and there is no one I can think of who I a not on speaking terms with...but little grudges. I need to forgive and let go. Our landlords, that's the biggest one that's coming to mind, it's not the only one, but we'll use it here for example's sake. The fact that I'm angry and frustrated at them does nothing to them. But it eats me, if I let it. And being angry isn't changing a darn thing...let it go! I can, and it feels good. Christ suffered too, he knows how I feel. The people that spit on him and the guards who thrust the spear into his side, never came back to say sorry, or to help him wipe the spit of his face, or offer him a band aide. Nope. But he forgave them too.

During Dawn's lesson she made a passing comment that Christ doesn't judge us, and isn't angry with us, doesn't hold it against us in any way, the part of the atonement that he paid for us personally. He doesn't say, "Krystal you caused me this many drops of blood, and so you are not as much loved by me as some others who caused me less pain." Not at all. He loves us all equally. He values all our lives the same. I'd never really thought about this before. After thinking about it for some time, I think I can understand this, a least a sliver, because I am a mother. Often, I find myself relating my relationship to my Heavenly Father and Christ, to that I have as a mother of children. It's the only way I know to catch a small amount of understanding. More specifically, relating to this train of thought, I have been pregnant 3 times. All my pregnancies have been relatively easy compared to some, but let's face it, pregnancy is never a walk in the park. I don't love Lincoln more because I got to take naps and rest a lot during my pregnancy with him. And I don't love Adelia less because my back hurt continually and I was an emotional roller coaster during my pregnancy with her. And I don't love Ivan less because I was in labor with him the longest. I love all of my children the same. I would go through the same aches and pains I went through the first time, again, in order that they could be here on this earth as my children. And really, when I think about, even their behavior since they've been here doesn't effect my love for them. They all three are equally angels and demons on any given occasion. Their behavior might change the way I interact with them, or what privileges I allow them to have, but it doesn't change the love I have for them. Maybe this analogy is a poor one to describe my relationship with my Savior, but it's what I've got.

These are my thoughts this Easter day 2012. I am grateful for my Savior and his understanding of me and his patience with me. I'm grateful for his love. I'm grateful for the beautiful music that always seems to touch my heart more directly than any words ever could. I am grateful for bits of understanding that come pieces at a time. I am thankful for the warm sunshine, and being together with family members. I know that Heavenly Father gave us all these things because he loves us. So this Sunday, I'm writing this feeling loved, and blessed, and full.

Macey's Easter Scavenger Hunt

After beautiful weather most of the week, we woke up to the snowstorm of the year this morning. It's not supposed to last, and my guess is, that it will melt before the end of the day. It was kind of random though. And as we were driving Aaron to work this morning, Lincoln said, "Mom, this is NOT a good day for a bike ride."

Later on in the morning, we met up with some of our friends at Provo Macey's for the annual Easter scavenger hunt that they do for pre-schoolers. I like it so much better than the typical, every-one-get-trampled-and-come-away-empty-handed Easter egg hunts that they do at the parks. As you walk in the door of Macey's someone hands you a paper with 9 different animals on it. The kids get to walk around to all the different departments looking for giant pictures of those animals, when they find it, they go to the counter closest to where the picture is hung (the deli counter for example, or the meet counter, or the pharmacy) and tell the cashier what sound that animal makes, and then the cashier hand them a plastic egg for their efforts. Everyone gets the same number of eggs, everyone has fun looking for the animals, there are no crazy parents out to kill each other to make sure their toddler gets an egg, it's great. My kids have a blast every year.

 Lincoln, Sam, Tyler, Ivan, Adelia, and Carson

They also get to make bunny ear hats, and have their noses painted like a bunny if they want. This year, Lincoln and Adelia were in, and Ivan was not. And no amount of coaxing was going to convince him that he wanted bunny ears. But it's all good. We had a good time, and that's what counts.

I've been kind of a slacker about Easter this year. Last year we did all sorts of awesome activities for the week proceeding Easter, that taught the real meaning of Easter in fun ways and how we celebrate our Savior. This year, I haven't had the energy to come up with anything fun. We haven't even done an art project. I'm really behind. I need to get on the ball...I feel like I'm failing as a parent in the religious education department this go-around.

The Poisonwood Bible, Some Thoughts

I love to read. That's probably an understatement. I'm currently reading The Poisonwood Bible by Barbara Kingsolver for the second time. And man, it's doing hula-hoops around my brain. I love it. The book is so much better the second time through, because I understand so much more of the foreshadowing, plot, etc. because I already know how it's going to end. I think during the first read the suspense of the unknown killed me. But this go around I'm not worrying and wondering about the ending; instead, I'm diving deeper into the characters and the history, and the things I think Kingsolver was really trying to say when she wrote the book. And there's a lot. It's deep, really deep. I believe it's a book that will get better with each read, and maybe after I've read it 40 times I'll understand all there is to understand about it.

 I'll tell you what though, when I'm finished reading Poisonwood Bible again, I have a strong urge to reread Heart of Darkness by Jospeh Conrad, and Things Fall Apart by Chinua Achebe. I'd also really like to read King Leopold's Ghost by Adam Hochschild for the first time. There is so much African history that I either a.) don't understand all the way, or b.) Didn't know even happened. 

The first time I read the book, I liked Leah and Adah best. I still like them, but this go around, I'm intrigued with Orleanna, the mother. I don't know if it's because in the first read I had no idea what she was talking about most of the time, that's probably it. Most all her entries seem to be from the end looking back, while the other girls written in the present, and so some of the things she's talking about haven't happened yet, so you don't realize she's talking about them until the second read. But what powerful insight she has about certain things. 


"Fifteen years after it all happened, I sat by my radio in Atlanta listening to Senator Church and the special committee hearings on the Congo. I dug my nails into my palms till I'd pierced my own flesh. Where had I been? Somewhere else entirely? Of the coup, in August, I'm sure we'd understood nothing. From the next five months of Lumumba's imprisonment, escape, and recapture, I recall -- what? The hardships of washing and cooking in a drought. A humiliating event in the church, and rising contention in the village. Ruth May's illness, of course. And a shocking scrap with Leah, who wanted to go hunting with the men. I was occupied so entirely by each day, I felt detached from anything so large as a month or a year. History didn't cross my mind. Now it does. Now I know, whatever your burdens, to hold yourself apart from the lot of more powerful men is an illusion. On that awful day in January 1961, Lumumba paid with a life and so did I. On the wings of an owl the fallen Congo came to haunt even our little family, we messengers of goodwill adrift on a sea of mistaken intentions."


I love the whole chapter this except came from, but I'll only share this one paragraph. The language is beautiful like that through almost all of the book, but especially from the perspective of Orleanna. And I get what she's saying here...Sometimes we feel like so much is going on in our immediate day-to-day lives, that trying to comprehend what's going on on a larger scale seems impossible. Big history is made largely while most people are living their lives completely unaware of it. I feel that. I would love to pay attention, and know what's going on in the government, and the elections, etc right now. I'd love to feel like I had an informed opinion, and could vote wisely. But alongside the demanding day-to-day everything that goes on in my own household, the task of trying to untangle and figure out a twisty, slippery government seems daunting and unachievable. I wonder if I will look back at these days with the same regret that Orleanna feels? Once I find out the big picture years down the road. I don't know, but it's something worth thinking about.

 

Mailbox

One of Aaron's first projects after moving in (like we moved in Saturday and he built the mailbox on Monday) was constructing this lovely mail box. It's not one of the things we had really planned on doing right off, but as it turns out, if you don't have a mailbox you don't get your mail. Imagine that. :) I think he did a nice job. It's the best looking mailbox on the street. In my humble opinion.

Oh! And in other great news, Aaron found our camera battery charger. Huzzah! (interjection. Used to express joy, encouragement, or triumph.)

Potty Training: Back on the docket

Now that we've moved, I have a few simple (ha!) goals for the remainder of the year, #1 potty train Ivan and #2 get Adelia sleeping in a big girl bed. Sounds fun, eh?

We'll start with #1 first, and if things go the way they went with Lincoln, we'll be ready to start goal #2 sometime around Thanksgiving.

The good news is, the kids bathroom is now big enough to fit our entire family (plus toys, books, and blankets) comfortably, so we can have a party in there every time Ivan needs to go. Doesn't Aaron look like he's having fun?

Let the potty training begin! (again)

Play Ball!

We've had some really nice days here since we moved. We don't have a yard, but that hasn't stopped Lincoln from pulling out the tee and/or begging me to toss him balls to hit. When Ivan is awake he joins us too. Lincoln is a righty, and I'm teaching Ivan to bat left handed, he's pretty natural at it, so it wouldn't surprise me if he's inclined to be a lefty anyway. Either way, it's been fun to play ball in the backyard.

From the Phone

The good thing about having to use my camera phone these last few weeks, is that it finally motivated me to upload some of the pictures that have been on there for awhile. Like this first set for example, these pictures are from our last trip to Washington, Christmas break 2010.

And here are pictures of Adelia's first time on the swing, last spring.

And one of Lisa and her boys at Conference last year that I've been meaning to send her...

And some funnys of Adelia last summer

I like finding pictures from awhile ago. I can remember back to all of these things, and they don't seem that long ago, but look how much my kids have changed. Sure makes me glad I do my blog books, even if Aaron does tease me that our children have had their pictures taken every single day of their lives. I'll get to remember them forever that way.

Dream Laundry Room

Maybe dream should never proceed the words laundry room. Actually when I welcomed Krystal to her dream laundry room she said something like, "No, my dream laundry room would be handing the laundry to someone and having it clean and folded when I came back," but at least we're a little closer... I built shelves.

We have no before shot, so just imagine there are no shelves and all of that junk is sitting on the kitchen counter and in boxes in the laundry room making it nearly impossible to move around in there. (Our laundry room looks really small in that picture, but there is a lot of space to the right that you can't see).